Wednesday, May 25, 2011

God Grows the Fruit of Your Good Work, Even if not Seen until Eternity

            You don’t always get to see the fruit of your goodness. Special traits and services like gentleness, hospitality, an open home, encouragement, spontaneous little acts to lend a hand, a listening ear, a friendly word, and a warm, welcoming heart and attitude sometimes go unnoticed or seem like they get thrown back in your face. As discouraging as that can get, God encourages us to always show love. Jesus commands us to “’Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another’” (John 13:34-35), and we do these things to serve and glorify God. Ultimately God produces the fruit, even if we don’t see it until eternity, and that’s what matters. We should never stop trying to show love because any time we shine God’s light a seed is planted, whether it ever grows or not, and God always has a greater purpose in everything.
            Despite feeling taken advantage of, doubtful of yourself, or discouraged because of these instances, the situations provide a chance to test your faith and obedience to God and an opportunity for growth in your relationship with Him. You get to practice being a true servant. Galatians 6:9-10 reminds us, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.”
            God’s assured me of this recently when I have felt discouraged by my efforts to love on some friends. Even if it seems like an act bounces off a person, it could serve as some warmth for that friend. God’s blessed me with the gifts of hospitality and encouragement to share His love, and I try to open my heart and my home to welcome my friends. Those gifts and my desire to have quality time and conversation with people drive me to express friendship through invitations for engagements like lunch, dinner, or tea dates (or the traditional weekly Sunday Tea open house). Typically this goes over well, and my friend(s) and I enjoy some bonding time together, but those cases also exist where people leave these proposals unanswered. That can happen for reasons ranging from they don’t really want to hang out with me to they don’t quite interact the same way as I do or they couldn’t make the one engagement and forget about others.
            God built me to hold a pen in my hand; I write people notes. While a couple friends have expressed how much my words have meant to them, a lot of times I don’t know exactly how the letter reaches the recipient. For all I know, people have gotten my letters in the mail and subsequently burned them. Maybe they’re read and tossed aside; maybe they’re put in a special box for such treasures. While I might get curious about what happens, it’s not the main reason for writing. I get to let God use me as a vessel to share His love through my words. No matter what happens to them, God uses them to warm my friends’ hearts, whether that happens immediately or years from now or whether I know it or not.
Once in a while small unknowns like that finally add up to make me feel doubtful of myself, but that’s not what matters. I serve God, and I try to glorify Him by sharing His love, especially in the ways He specially equipped me. These times of doubt remind me that I lean on Him as He’s always got me in the palm of His hand. In turn that shows me my real purpose: glorifying God and furthering His kingdom. If everything always went smoothly, I wouldn’t know how good things really are. The doubtful times remind me how to be a true servant. Even though I might not see the greater significance at the time, God works through everything for His plan and the good of everyone.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

The Veiled Significance

They say love will keep you up all night
Now that we've said goodbye
My nights are filled with you
though I don't remember them entirely
I know you appear in my dreams
My thoughts carry you with me
I wake up reminded of you
because you're still there
In my slumber my heart reveals
the hope and love for you
that's still alive in me
and urges me to carry on
as over time the greater plan unfolds


Everything holds significance
for now we're apart
but someday we'll see how
our friendship shaped us
for each other or for another
planting seeds in our hearts
to blossom true love when we finally break down
admitting our desire to be loved
and stop hiding behind masks
both less up-in-arms
You'll lower your porcupine quills
and I'll stop pushing to maintain distance
we'll embrace one of God's greatest gifts
modeled after His great love for us



For now we continue our lives
in different places but always in God's world
living under His watch, witnessing Him weave into our lives
acting in everything, His beauty surrounding all
as His plans beyond imagination emerge as we follow Him
as we grow deeper
we fulfill our purpose
standing firm in God's salvation and love
A seed's been planted
but we must wait
to see if it blossoms
growing in a new field
or intertwining with my blooming love
but for now the significance remains veiled

In My Own Home

I've never felt this alone
The quiet's all around
Everyone I know
Everyone I loved
has gone away
but I'm still here
in the same place with the same face
only everything's changed

It's not the same without you here
Your presence gone, I feel the hole
a shadow on my heart
I used to rest assured, knowing you were near
Knowing you're not, I move forward
Your scent lost in the air
I go out under the same sky
and I carry on, wishing you were here

As it's time to transition again
I know life will be fine
My routine keeps me in check
as i adjust to this next part.
Though things aren't the same
I know you are there
whether or not we meet again